Walking

Jake and Charlie need to walk, I guess.  At least they enjoy it.  They’ve gone days without real long walks.  But now they get to walk in the suburbs.  Hoorah!  They are less likely to find a gram of unsmoked marijuana on the ground on the current route.  That was one of the joys of Ritner park.  That, and the constant danger that you might be shot.

Walking helps clear the mind.  If you don’t want a clear mind, walking is depressing.  This is particularly true when it is beautiful outside.  The weather report suggests that it will remain relatively beautiful through Friday.  Colder, but sunny.

 

The worst part about walking Jake and Charlie is that they like to shit a lot.  Also, they like to eat things they find along the way, which may or may not be shit.  Sometimes, if you’re lucky, it’s a decomposing animal, or ordinary garbage.  The advantage of walking Jake and Charlie in the winter is that you get to wear gloves, which offer a layer of protection against decomposing animals and their shit when you have to force Jake to spit out whichever of the two he’s eating.  This is one of life’s small blessings, right up there with jock itch.

(What is jock itch?  Do people still get jock itch?  Jock itch reminds me of a 50’s high school locker room.  I always picture guys with crew cuts slapping each other in the balls with towels, and the jock itch lice swinging from pube nest to pube nest while the closeted ex-navy gym teacher looks on.  They didn’t have “manscaping” back then, so everyone had a pube nest.  Does anyone else picture that?  Maybe that’s just me.  I should probably see a therapist.)  Jake and Charlie enjoyed their walk, at least.  Dogs are pretty simple.  I guess that’s why I love them.