Remiss Ommission

I would be remiss were I to omit from our bloggy discourse a link to the wonderful Great Gatsby Game that has been widely circulating on the internets. Considering this blog’s fondness for Fitzgerald, and Gatsby in particular, it would be highly irregular to leave out even a token link to the roaring 20’s zeitgeist. Enjoy!

Side note: Amazon.com has Gatsby with an aggregate rating of 4 out of 5 stars. Apparently, John Grisham’s The Firm is a superior work of literature. Dear American public, please jump off a bridge. Thanks. Your pal, hazenberger.

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It’s once every 13 years. You gotta recharge the Mitva!

Little Dorrit (aka LD, which brings to mind Leon Black from Curb, hence the post title) blogging, very early edition.

‘In our course through life, we shall meet the people who are coming to meet us, from many strange places and by many strange roads,’ was the composed reply; ‘and what it is set to us to do to them, and what it is set to them to do to us, will all be done.’

Breathe that shit in for a second.

I really don’t have much to add except to say that 1000 Dan Browns with 1000 typewriters, typing for 1000 years could never create anything nearly as brilliant, let alone within the first 40 pages of an 862 page novel.

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Fo shizza my Quizza

Today is Thursday and I am in Philadelphia, which means that it is time for Quizzo at the Ugly American, hosted by Johnny Goodtimes. And serendipity of serendipities, tonight’s topic is Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll. Considering I just finished reading about Keith Moon’s various debaucheries in Full Moon: The Amazing Rock & Roll Life of Keith Moon late of The Who, late of The Earth (Sadly Out of Print) and that yesterday’s blogging focused on the new Simpsons porno, I’m predicting an incredibly strong showing. Insert Topical Team Name Here, unite!

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Twain revisited

I read lots of political blogs and Ta-Nehisi Coates at The Atlantic is one of my consistent favorites. The other day I linked to a discussion going on at his blog about the revised Huckleberry Finn. Yesterday, the discussion continued:

I’m obviously not Mark Twain, but having written a book, I can only imagine how hard Twain worked. I would be incensed if someone went through my book and took out all the “niggers” or “bitches” or “motherfuckers.” It’s really just a hair short of some stranger, in their preening ignorance, putting their hands on your kid.

To me that’s the worst part; surely we are, as Jamelle says, peddling whitewashed ignorance, but much worse we’re actually peddling it at Twain’s expense. I think the worse part of censoring Twain, is that it’s a shocking act of disrespect toward the writer, executed by people who claim to hold up his legacy.

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California Adventures, the prequel

Last month, I took a week long trip to California. My adventures were documented in a series of emails entitled “Hermosa Daze” which may or may not make their way onto the blog in some fashion in the future. But for every Star Wars: A New Hope, there is a Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. This evening, from the Hazen/Limarzi vault a document was discovered that outlined a similar trip. This one transpired between Thursday January 21, 1988 to Monday January 25, 1988. Formatting and spelling have been recreated as accurately as possible. The document you are about to read, is real.

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Uneventful

My trip to Davis Library to pick up Little Dorrit was uneventful. There was no sign of the Davis Library Masturbator. (file photo)

I pledge to remain vigilant. Remember: if you see something, say something.

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TONY’S RESTAURANT. FINE FOOD AND DRINK. KEEP OUT

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one’s own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind.  Orr was crazy and could be grounded.  All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions.  Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn’t, but if he was sane he had to fly them.  If he flew them he was crazy and didn’t have to; but if he didn’t want to he was sane and had to.  Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle.

“That’s some catch, that Catch-22,” he observed.

“It’s the best there is,” Doc Daneeka agreed.

When your life explodes all around you, it seems to me, it may be desirable to make changes.  Some of these changes are conscious.  For example, I’ve tried to watch less television.  I determined that Facebook had become a trivial time waster that I would do well to log off from for a while (And yet somehow, Mark Zuckerberg is still a billionaire).  Other changes are subconscious. I’ve been eating inappropriately small meals, for example.  (Despair, it turns out, is an excellent dieting tool.  I highly recommend it.)

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